Oulipost #29: Canada Dry

Prompt: The name of this procedure is taken from the soft drink marketed as “the champagne of ginger ales.” The drink may have bubbles, but it isn’t champagne. In the words of Paul Fournel, who coined the term, a Canada Dry text “has the taste and color of a restriction but does not follow a restriction.” (A musical example is Andrew Bird’s “Fake Palindromes.”)  Be creative, and write a poem sourced from your newspaper that sounds like it’s been Oulipo-ed, but hasn’t.

Source: Cape Cod Times, Wednesday, April 30, 2014

family rapidly of rising than
 prices dozen are cod putting will
no squeeze branches of limes
on a Tuesday.

when animal league boston
Mexican truck low-cost
and surgeries who aren't
the lime juice spike
and shore dog inching towards
a cat who came home
procedures, told local clinics.

visit the combination waggin'
Tuesday has taken big parked
in the tire lot no restaurants
unplanned margarita
which be average burden
owners animal league say.