rummaging through her coach knock-off
searching for the kit;
a tube of strawberry lip gloss,
drosophila and lonely sequin
beside her g-string footwear -
and i watched this from the bathroom stall
beside her -
pushing aside the dirty laundry money
she made waiting tables
3 comments:
I usually don't say this about poems, but I want this to be longer. I think it's a great establishment of a character here, and I really would want to follow her further. I think you should try your hand at something narrative. If you want...
you really think she works, then? i don't know if i could write more about her, but i will definatly give it a try. thanks arch ^_^
i agree. i think it should be longer. it has a very electric start and it just stops abruptly. SUSTAIN!
cheers
-bryan
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